They are getting back at us

Holly Would


 

 

People ask me, “Don’t you want children?” or “Don’t you wish you had children?” and I answer back, “I don’t need to have children. I have a mother.”

I love my mother. I find her funny. She will allow me to eat her last piece of summer sausage. She will make things for me just because I ask her to. She will give me things that were given to her by her grandmother just because I like it. (And she’s desperately trying to get rid of things.) I love my mother.

My mother also drives me crazy. Come on. Admit it. You have felt the same way about your mother.

We are born to a woman. This woman then takes care of us. She changes our diapers. She bathes us. She feeds us. She brings us to our first day of school – or sends us with our two older sisters. She makes costumes for plays we are in. She gives us money when we go on field trips. She drives us four states away to college. She picks us up from the airport when we fly home.

And then something happens. One day our mothers realize, “Hey! I’m getting older but I don’t want to admit that to my children.” So, they continue doing things they’ve always done. You know, they walk on icy streets and sidewalks. They drive at night even though it’s hard for them to see. They refuse to get a walk-in tub even though it’s difficult for them to sit in a traditional tub.

You find yourself saying things like, “No! Let me do it for you.” “Do you really think you should be doing that?” “Because I said so!” “Just wait for me to come over!” “No! No! No! I’ll do that!”

I swear my mother does these things on purpose. I swear she has a little smirk on her face when I try to urge her to wait for one of us. She is an adult, after all. Does she really need to listen to me?

Yes! She does. I’m not trying to hurt her. I’m trying to keep her safe. I’m trying to make sure that the years she has left are good and relatively pain-free.

I don’t need children. I have a mother. And I am so grateful that I have a mother who drives me crazy. Because some day, I’m going to miss the fact that she drove me crazy. So, I’m going to spend whatever time we have left on this earth trying to take care of her. And she going to spend whatever time we have left driving me crazy. Because she can.

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